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Why Filipinos Hate Each Other Pt. 4 (Sexual Manipulation)

It takes a glimpse into another culture to realize how absolutely toxic Filipino attitudes towards sex are. Given that most Filipino attitudes are derivative of American attitudes, they share these two main characteristics when it comes to sex:

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1. The Madonna / Whore dichotomy.

Celebrities are either sluts or saints. If a saint-type celebrity is found to be a normal sexual being, it is a scandal.

Tough choice

This teaches women to hide their sexuality if they don’t want to be seen as whores. Unable to express desire, the inner growth of the woman is stunted. If this attitude about sex is internalized, natural sexual desires are either frozen (the woman can no longer enjoy sex because she has dissociated from that part of herself) or perverted (the woman gives in to her desires, labels herself pathological and acts accordingly).

2. Sex as a commodity

Because you couldn’t possibly have chosen this on your own like a mature human being

Women withhold sex because they’re told it’s an indication of their worth. I remember some obnoxious memes going “Di ka cheap, teh.” Flip that statement and read the obverse: Women who have sex outside the “appropriate” context are cheap. Appropriate according to whom? According to other women.

Men react to this by seeking to sneak past the barriers that women put up: the wall of thorns around their sleeping beauty. (“Prove my worth to me.”) They sense that women use sex as a commodity and they respond by doing the same.

Sex becomes a transaction. Less worth for the woman, who has lost her virtue; more worth for the man, who has gained an indication of his masculinity.

In this transaction, both lose. They use another human being like an object, and this makes them less human too. If this pattern repeats often enough, it will become so reinforced that the person will be unable to see sex as an expression of love.

This explains the prevalence of coercion and rape in Filipino society.

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